“okay,” I said slowly. “Thank you
True to his word, he made an effort. They were chunny efforts, fatos nonetheless. He loaded the dishouder incorrectly. and I corrected it when he wasn’t looking. He wiped down counter with too much force.
He tried, au!!!
soften. I did my best not to become angry while he tried to be better at cleaning.
A rhythm started to develop. Tcooked dinner one night, The actically sat down and ate with me. Another night, we watched a movie in the dark, not touching, but our knees brushed once and deither of us moved away.
Every once in a while, he left another dish in the sink, and I had to take a breath. Still, I wasn’t as angry anymore
Then came the storm.
It blew in like something out of a novel. It was complete with thick clouds, heavy wind, and thunder that shook the windows. Minutes into the howling storm, the lights cut out completely. I fumbled for a flashlight before I finally found one and clicked in
“Logan?” I called, trying to keep the edge out of tuy voice. Something about being left in the dark always made nue heart pound unpleasantly.
“It’s alright,” came his voice from the other room. “We can set up some candles if you want.”
I made my way toward the sound of his voice, my heart thundering along with the storm outside. He met me halfway, candle in one hand, bottle of whiskey in the other.
“Prepared for the apocalypse, I see.”
“You have no idea,” he said with a smirk.
We ended up in the living room. The storm raged outside, wind rattling against the windows like claws against glass.
We managed to find a few more candles and
and set them up on the coffee table. The only light came from the soft flames, casting flickering shadows on his face.
Tkept the flashlight nearby just in case
I pulled my blanket around me and tucked my legs under. He stayed on the other end of the couch. I should have been relieved by
the space, but it only made the air feel heavier.
“Did you
“Did you ever imagine this?” I asked.
He raised a brow. “Ablackout?”
“Living together. Like this.”
He hesitated. Then, softer than I expected, he said, “Not like this.“”
I swallowed. “How then?”
“With less fire between us. ”
That made me laugh in a bitter but amused way.
isn’t always a bad thing”
“No,” he said quietly. “But this burns.”
For a while, we listened to the rain. I watched the candlelight catchin his eyes, highlighting every sharp angle of his jaw.
“Why do you do that?” Lasked.
He looked at me, puzzled “Do what?”
“Act like you’re indifferent when you’re not.”
He didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he leaned forward, elbows on his knees, staring at the flame.
Because It’s easier that way.
that way. When y
you take things one step at
La tine, like a business plan, everything comes easier.”
“Life’s not a business though”
“You may be right. Especially with you in the picture, It’s been mon difficult to be as calculated as usually am.”
My breath caught in my throat. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He looked up, his eyes locking with mine. “Sometimes your presence makes me want to throw rationality out the window.”
“Is that good?”
“I’m not sure.
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how to feel. I’d been so frustrated with him lately, it was difficult to understand any other feelings that had been bubbling under the surface. Or maybe was angry to cover up anything else I might have been feeling
The silence between us crackled louder than the thunder. He stood, walked over slowly, as if fighting an internal battle with every step. He knelt in front of me, close enough that I felt the heat of his skin.
His hand rose, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear. Then it lingered at my jaw, his thumb grazing my cheekbone.
I tilted my face up, eyes fluttering closed. The tension stretched until it was unbearable.
Then, he pulled back and stood up straight.
And stepped away like he was retreating from the edge of a cliff.
“We should get some sleep,” he said hoarsely.
I didn’t say anything. My heart was pounding so loudly I was sure he could hear it. I couldn’t tell why either. Was it fear? Was I awestruck? Was I disappointed? I don’t even know what I thought was going to happen.
He left the room without another word.
I sat there, staring into the dimming candlelight, trying to make sense of the ache that bloomed in my chest.
I think he thought about kissing me. Yet, he didn’t. Why, I’d never know.
The worst part was how much I wanted him to finish what he started.
